November 3...The Big Talk

 Well, we had the talk on Friday. It was NOT planned. My hand was forced, but it happened, and I'm glad it did. 

Legit 5 pages of talking points. And, admittedly, I did feel bad for not having brought up all of it sooner. But, as I told him, it's because of how he reacts/acts/treats me/etc. that I don't.

I did record the session - just in case. And, 90% of it was me talking. He responded to a couple things, but nothing earth shattering. 

Kinda funny, Friday was our 5-year Ohio Receptionaversary, too. But, again. It went well.

Things have been OK since. We're both trying and I HOPE he/we can both see that. I also hope it's not one of those short-term things--which of course, he called me out on being a downer/negative nancy/looking at the bad/bringing on the jinx. But, I told him. HISTORICALLY it never lasts and I get thrown down the shithole. It's not thinking negative, it's a historic FACT.

Anywho, yea. I've been trying to be more open/honest with him, too. When something comes up, I say it. If something hits me wrong, I mention it. It's not easy, but I'm doing it. I also think he's smoking more because he's chattier, nicer, and I can see it in his eyes, lol. 

Fingers crossed it sticks. Charlie has been really great with him SINCE this change...I'm trying to keep a tally/note of K's moods and Charlie's moods to be able to show him if things get iffy again. .

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