Air Mai - Under the Surface

I think one of our big problems is we spend too much time together. I don't think he feels that way, but I think that might be an issue. Because, every night it's the "what do you want to do" game. And, every night, it's the same selection of things.  Watch tv/movie (which I LOVE and he hates) Sit by a fire Play pool/games Do our own thing Maybe we do need more variety or something? But with the weather break he has outdoor house stuff to do so going anywhere is meh. And, when Charlie goes to bed, WE can't go anywhere. What really is there to do? What do other people do? I wish he had friends to actually get together with, because it seems like when I want to go out (more often) he gets all pissy/hurt. Or turns it into I want to be with my friends more than work on our relationship (i.e., you make time for everyone else...) I know he's at work all day and we don't see each other all day, but that's ok, right? I mean, not everything needs to be a gr...

 W...tf.  After an iffy Tuesday, I asked if we could have a judgement-free check in. These typically entailed a free/safe space to TALK about anything that was bothering us or on our minds without fighting. Ha. Not so much. Charlie was absolutely adorable and SO cute with us on Tuesday. But, Wednesday was a different story. He was anti-daddy and VERY gremliny to him. It got so bad while K was pushing him on the swing, K literally blew up, said "I can't fuckin' take anymore of this shit," pushed past Charlie in the swing, said you can sit there by yourself, and stormed downstairs. I asked Charlie why he was mean and he said he didn't know, that he wanted to get down and daddy wouldn't pick up something he wanted. I told him we need to apologize, took him downstairs, and had him say he was sorry for being mean, he loves him, and to come upstairs and play. K said no and sat outside for a bit. I told Charlie he HAS to be nice to daddy because it makes mommy sad. H...

 So, it totally comes down to HOW he talks to me. That is my trigger. He sounds angry and mad and condescending and annoyed. But, what if that's just the way he is? What if that's the "norm" but I never recognized it before? I don't remember him always being this way..but what if he's right and I'm just overly sensitive?  Example: Charlie came in our room this morning at 5am. Wouldn't lay down in our bed, he wanted me to come back to his room. So, I did. Fast forward to K getting ready for work and he was like "Why don't you just tell him no?! Tell him to go back to bed. Tell him he'll get a surprise if he stays in bed! Why do you always give in to him. Things are getting worse NOT better. Sigh - of course I felt all edgy and blah after that. And, then he seemed moody and weird. Yes, he's not a morning person by nature, but his morning moods just feel tension-laden.  One of my friends asked if he changes his tone when others are around...